Breaking the Mold.....Stop pumpfakin!

Recently I've been giving advice to some friends on relationships, friendship, and overall life. What I've found is that everyone's problem is the same. They're molding themselves into what other people want them to be. Hiding their true colors and creating little characters for the people around them to enjoy.

Sounds weird right?? But A LOT of people do it. Just think do you have a certain person/grp of ppl who classify you as funny and every time you get around them they expect you to tell a joke or entertain them? And when you're not in the mood, they immediately ask "Whats wrong?". Thats because you molded yourself into a one dimensional character for those people. Yes, your silly at times but you do also have many other sides to you. And continuously hiding your other emotions hinders you from being yourself around them.

Another example....is there a guy/girl in your life that you started talking to and when you get around them your playful, silly, carefree and that the basis of your relationship? But once you bring up a serious topic or ask serious question you get the twitter face O_o.

Or do you play the tough role, the "I dont need anyone but myself" role. So everyone you met never tries to get close or tries to take care of you because "You're so tough", as you say.

Guys do it too. They force themselves to go out, get in girls, and drink. When all they really want is that someone special they can chill at home with because they're tried of that life.

You're molding yourself into characters that other people can relate to and have fun with and yes this is effective but has no longevity. Most people would call this "playing roles". And playing a role can only last so long.

One of my friends came to me about being in a loveless relationship, she gets no excitement from it, shes unhappy but stay in it because its comfortable and she doesnt want to leave and let him down.

So she continues to play this role as the loving & happy girlfriend when she really wants to be single and enjoying her life as is. She satisfy him with this "character" she created but its not the real her.

Same with friendships. I know we all have one of those "friends" that we're in constant competition with. You guys are supposedly "cool" but you dont want to tell her ALL you're business because you know she'll judge you, or write it down in her mental notebook so she can later compare how much better her life is.

So you keep your real problems to yourself, just so you can LOOK like your life's all together. Once again pretending and hiding who you are in order to fit in to other peoples perceptions of you.

When we think of "playing roles" we think of someone lying or trying to fit in we don't ever imagine ourselves....but we ALL do it! In relationships,friendships, sex lives. and even with our parents.

Have you ever sat and thought who am I? What am I doing? And where do I wanna end up? What do I want? What do I like?.....If not you should.

Finding out the answers to all these question will help you find YOU! That feeling of emptiness when your alone, that dissatisfaction with the ppl & things in your life, that urge to just change scenery all comes from not being content with YOU.

Just think about how much you think about what ppl think of you lol. Tweets, FB pictures, the clothes you wear,your phone, the car you drive, "the hoes you pull, are all acts to impress others.

You cannot be compliant all your life, or adapt to yourself to the the needs of others because in all this adaption you'll lose the original beauty that is you.

Stop doing things to please others. Take care of what you want to do, what you have to do & what God asks of you and you'll find happiness in just being & doing YOU.

“Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.” ~Dr.Sesus ^_^

Alpha Probate

On April 10, 2011 the men of Alpha Phi Alpha Fraternity Incorporated held their annual probate at South Kedzie, on the campus of Michigan State University.

"A probate is put on in order to show tribute to the new initiates. We are honoring their hard work and dedication in becoming new members of the fraternity," said the fraternity's treasurer Al Martin.

The fraternity crossed four new members. Kevin Jackson, Paris Wilson,Anton Woods, and Phillip Lewis (below).
"Alpha Phi Alpha Fraternity Incorporated is a non-hazing, non-pledging organization. Founded on December 4, 1906 at Cornell University," said De'Anthony Ryan President of APA.

" However, the process to become an Alpha is a very difficult road. A lot of hard work, time and dedication is put into aspiring to join the organization," said Ryan.

"The process of becoming an Alpha changed me for the good, it kind of chipped the rough edges I had off of me," said Ryan.

"I became more professional, disciplined, and mentally stronger. I honor the journey I took to becoming an Alpha, it taught me a lot about myself and life," said Ryan.

Hundreds of students gathered to see the young men reveal themselves to the public.

They began the probate with,the eldest Alpha,Brian Cotton. He introduced the "neos", new members, to the crowd one by one.

They all had their moment to shine and step to the front of the crowd. Along with stepping, which is a way to use your entire body as a instrument by stomping and chanting,they sang a traditional hem and recited their history to the audience.

"Becoming an Aloha helped me realize the importance of brotherhood and perseverance," said one of the newest members Phillip Lewis.

"I really feel like joining this fraternity is helping me to better manage my time and gave me a new appreciation for black culture," said Lewis.

"It is a good feeling to help someone become an Alpha, we are always welcoming on new brothers and encourage the growth of the brotherhood," said Ryan.

"We look forward to having more brothers to join us on the mission to serve all mankind," said Ryan.

"Being Alpha Man means always embodying all which Alpha Phi Alpha stands for from the mission statement to the aims. Being an Alpha Man means to hold yourself to higher standards and to remember that your actions can be reflective of the organization," said Ryan.

Depression Deepens

Sometimes simple solutions to depression aren't always enough for everyone. The problem is much deeper and needs serious attention.

Untreated depression can lead to suicide. Suicide has been called "The permanent soultion to a temporary problem." Many people feel trapped and begin to see no solution but death.

Physiological pain is just as significant as physical pain. In fact many people who are facing physiological problems begin to use physical pain as an escape, perfect example suicide.

Woman tend to "attempt" suicide more than males using pills to overdose, but men tend to "complete" suicide attempts more than woman. Both cases are crucial cries for help.

Those who contemplate suicide often show signs of it. They may joke about killing themselves, or make statements about who life being unimportant, become reckless, abuse alcohol and drug, and some people become calmer after they've made up their mind about suicide.

Experts estimate 1,088 suicides occur at colleges every year - that's roughly 7.5 per 100,000 students.

For help and more information on suicides visit S.A.V.E a website on suicide and prevention.

Signs of Depression

College students across the nation deal with stress, fatigue, and anxiety on a day to day basis. This may be a result of home sickness, not enough sleep, not enough food, indulging too much in drugs and alcohol, or because of a stressful atmosphere.

Many people write these feelings off as a normal but the reality is these feelings are early signs of depression and depression leads many students to suicide.

Signs of Depression

1) Social Withdrawal-This the most common sign of depression. Many people pull away from friends & family. To counteract this you should try to surround yourself with loved ones in order to lift your spirits.

2) Rumination- Rumination is just a fancy word for over thinking or racking your brain about something. Depressed individuals usually ruminate about losed loved ones, failure, or past relationships. When you're depressed you tend to continuously think negative thoughts and turn everything in to something negative.

For example: Someone compliments a friends' outfit but not yours. You'll continue to wonder why and over think it.

3) Turning to Alcohol- Man people turn to alcohol or drugs as a cure for depression.

4) Cravings- Many people turn to eating as way to cope. Overly indulging and sweets and food. Frequent stomachaches, headaches, skin breaking out.

5) Change in sleep patterns-Sleeping too much or not enough.

If you find yourself feeling any of these ways here are some tips on how to turn things around.

Ooooomar

Who is this guy?????


I know your probably wondering who's this goofy looking guy in the blue.

Omar Sofradzija is a journalism 200 instructor at Michigan State. Born on February 18, from Chicago, blah blah blah but there's so much more to him.

Omar is a bubbly, caring, and hands on instructor. He originally envisioned himself as a "big city news columnist" and started his writing career at The Peoria Journalstar in Illinois.


After working close to home for awhile Omar decided to venture off. He moved to Las Vegas and started working at the Las Vegas Review Journal.

This is where he began his most memorable work; covering the Hurricane Katrina crisis was one of the most memorable experiences of his career. Omar was dropped off in the middle of the turmoil and left to find a story.

But after five years life in Las Vegas began to seem routine, Omar began to feel burnt out and in need of change.

Omar seen an ad in the paper saying MSU was looking for instructors, he decided to throw his hat in the ring and the rest became history.

The goofy guy in the photo is now a very well rounded educator, editorial adviser at the State News, and Vice President of the Michigan Collegiate Press Association.

Alternatives Options

If after reading the previous blog post and you still feel like college isn't for you here are some alternatives career paths and people who can guide you in the right direction...

Michigan State and many other institutions provide students with counselors and career service advisers who can guide you and help remove the cloud of frustration. You can visit the website or speak to an adviser in person.

"To make the most of a career advising session, it’s good to take a few moments to jot down some things you’d like to focus on with your adviser. No strenuous preparation is necessary for your first meeting, but chances are by the end of your first session you’ll have some things to do," according to their website.

Aside from the advisers, speak with your parents, influential people around, and those who don't have a degree and ask them the questions you need answered.

Leaving school is an adult decision that you should take very seriously. But once you weighed your pros and cons and come out deciding that leaving school is best for you than GO FOR IT!

Create a concrete plan and live your life. There are thousands of jobs that pay well and don't require a degree.

• Air traffic controller $102,030
• Storage and distribution manager: $66,600
• Transportation manager $66,600
• Police and detectives supervisor $64,430
• Non-retail sales manager $59,300

Is college really for you???

Have you every felt like college was a waste of your time? Like you were here because you had to be?

Many students feel this way, like college is holding them back instead of furthering them in their careers. Many feel stressed out, like their grades are mediocre, and they would be better off pursuing a "dream".

Many students may feel fidgety and discouraged about an education because their study habits aren't there, or because financially they don't have it, others may just be lazy.

But an collegiate education is very important in today's society. 62 percent of all careers require a college degree. College is more than just a place of assessment, its a place to grow.

College teaches you life long skills such as how to network, how to focus under pressure, and how to be on your own.

That's one side. But for those people who feel attached to this dream and maybe want to dance, sing, act, model, or anything along those lines maybe school isn't needed but it could be a crutch.

The types of jobs college graduates have access to are much better than those with high school diplomas. The unemployment rate for college graduates was just 2.2 percent last year, half the unemployment level of those with only high school diplomas.

So is college really for you??